Being a burlesque performer means being a boss. Many performers find burlesque empowering because they have agency on stage. Agency is the ability of a person to act as they choose in the world. Call it freedom, call it liberation: it is the ability to independently make your own choices. As a performer, I choose my name, my music, my movement, my creative process, my costume, my makeup, my story, and my character. I choose if, when, or how I reveal myself to the audience. Part of being a boss is about making decisions.
One thing I’ve noticed about women in my leadership development work, is that they always want to collaborate and/or find consensus. They want to double check their ideas and decisions with the group before moving forward. They want to make sure everyone feels included in every decision.
One thing I’ve noticed about women in my leadership development work, is that they always want to collaborate and/or find consensus. They want to double check their ideas and decisions with the group before moving forward. They want to make sure everyone feels included in every decision.
photo by Greg Holloway
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Does this sound familiar to you? It seems nice on the surface, to include everyone’s perspective, but I often find that the underlying motivation isn’t to be inclusive. The underlying motivation is fear.
There is a fear of being wrong (being seen as incompetent) and a fear of not being liked. Women consistently struggle with the paradox of being powerful or being liked. Sheryl Sandberg says, “Success and likability are positively correlated for men and negatively correlated for women.” This cultural story is one piece of the puzzle that drives our motivation and our fear. Other times the fear comes from a place of doubt and second-guessing oneself. Women wonder if they’ve earned the right to lead others. |
Being a boss is challenging. When you step into a leadership role your doubt, your questions about whether or not you are good enough, and your relationship with failure are front and center. It is scary to take responsibility for the direction and success of your own life, let alone the life and livelihood of others. It’s vulnerable to be a decision-maker. Don’t worry, I’ve got something to help.
Here are four different ways you can make decisions. Each one has strengths and weaknesses depending on the situation, time and resources available. These decision-making styles can be leveraged in a variety of leadership structures (shared/distributed leadership, collaborative leadership, vertical/hierarchal leadership, etc.).
Here are four different ways you can make decisions. Each one has strengths and weaknesses depending on the situation, time and resources available. These decision-making styles can be leveraged in a variety of leadership structures (shared/distributed leadership, collaborative leadership, vertical/hierarchal leadership, etc.).
- Autocratic: The leader decides what will happen and informs everyone else of the decision. If you use this style it helps to ask everyone else to paraphrase what you said so you can confirm they understood you correctly. Give directions in simple, short sentences.
- Consultative: The leader asks what others think, and then makes the decision. Here you can ask for others’ ideas and then decide, or you can have your decision in mind and ask for feedback before making a final decision. The trick to this style is to be clear so people don’t think they are voting or collaborating.
- Group Decision:
- Vote, each person gets one vote, including the leader. Remember, before voting, to decide how many votes are needed to win.
- Consensus is another option. Here, everyone offers their consent after deliberating an issue. Consent is not agreement, and the process of consensus has a range of distinct rules so make sure to clarify the rules being used up front. Consensus is best used when there are no time or resource constraints.
- Delegation: The leader gives the decision to another person or group to decide. The leader can offer guidance and coaching, but the decision is now the responsibility of another person.
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Today, reflect on which decision-making style you tend to use the most. Which is your default? Which gets you the best results? Which is the most difficult for you?
Then, practice flexing your other decision-making muscles. Whichever decision-making style you use the least, or feel least confident in, practice using it today at least 3 different times. |
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What is the next big decision you need to make and which decision-making strategy are you planning to use? Post it in the Burlesque for the Boardroom Facebook community.
Help a friend make better decisions. Invite them to sign up using this link. The world could use more bad ass bosses. |
SEE a show this weekend!
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The sacred and the profane exist as two sides of the same coin. The earth itself has become a dwelling place for the divine. Explore this tantalizing dichotomy with the ladies of Sinner Saint Burlesque and discover just how tempting it is when the depraved and the worshipful collide. Partake in sensual spirituals and convene with decadent deities. Allow us to lead you to the gardens of pleasure and delights. Sinner Saint Burlesque presents, "The Sacred and The Profane", where good is irreverent and evil is irrelevant.
Join us for our pre-show experience service! Confess your sins in the confessional, take a sacrament of sexy from our heavenly bodies, and explore what it truly means to connect to your inner Aphrodite. Come worship at the altar of the Burlesque Goddess, bow down to the divine feminine and take the body of delicious deities. Location: Seattle Immersive Theatre 701 5th Ave N, Seattle, WA 98109 Early service starts at 7pm, Thursday-Sunday Additional late night service starts at 10pm, Friday and Saturday Tickets here. |
